I think that makes three in one year! The most productive I've been in ages and this one has a little gay sex and dirty words! OMG! I'm practically a grown up now! I so love Rodney's medical issues. As far as I'm concerned they're all canon. That doesn't mean I don't love his hypochondria also!
Fandom: Stargate Altantis.
Pairing: Mckay/Sheppard.
Summary: It happened in the heat of the moment, but in hindsight it was pretty obvious that the love bite thing was a bad idea on multiple levels.
Authors note: Oh wow. This is my first graphic (yeah right) fic ever! Look! Dirty words! *Fans self* This is a little critique on a fanon favourite: why do people so many people assume Sheppard gets off on biting during the moment supreme? Is it because he's so hairy? More ludicrous to me however, is the thought that Rodney would actually be okay with it. Pain? Saliva near an *ahem* open wound? In my head that could only end something like this:
Rating: NC-17
Coitus interruptus (or the story of how a canary-dog thing might have impaired Colonel Sheppard’s judgement)
---
"OW!"
If the yelp of pain hadn't been enough to break the mood, the elbow in his face certainly would have done the trick.
John couldn't quite prevent his tumble from the narrow bed or the flinch as his sensitive cock was wrenched from its comfortable burrow in the process.
"What was that for?" He nursed his bleeding nose from his nest of sheet on the floor and shot Rodney a baleful glare.
Rodney glared back just as viciously, still rubbing his shoulder and wincing slightly as he jumped out of bed and out of Sheppard’s reach. "Good question. You did NOT just bite me!"
"Er." John glanced guiltily at the reddened skin and, oh yeah, teeth marks. "...Sorry?"
Rodney quickly wrenched a sheet out from underneath John and wrapped it firmly around his hips. "Sorry?! Sorry he say's. You BIT me!" He shuffled into the bathroom trying to check his back in the small asymmetrical mirror. "Am I bleeding? God, this is so unhygienic. What were you thinking?!"
John stared down glumly at his softening dick. The buzz of an imminent orgasm was fading fast now it was becoming obvious that this was as much fun as he was going to get tonight. Rodney of course had already come. The bastard.
"I wasn't really thinking." He muttered. "It was just the heat of the moment."
Now that he was thinking about it, it seemed obvious that the love bite thing had been a pretty horrible idea on multiple levels. Rodney didn't do pain at the best of times and insisted on a condom for blowjobs for God's sake. Regardless of the fact that they were probably the cleanest people in two galaxies with the constant medical check ups.
"Well, that's obvious. Any particular reason you felt like giving me an festering open wound?” Rodney continued scornfully. “Do you know how many germs there are in human saliva?”
John didn't, but he was sure their resident hypochondriac could enlighten him. It wasn’t as if he’d bitten that hard. He desperately started looking around for his clothes.
Rodney snatched his BDU's right out of his hands, "Where do you think you're going?"
John gestured vaguely towards the door. "I just thought..."
"Oh my God, you're right! We should definitely check with Carson!"
"...What? No Rodney!"
"The uncontrolled biting thing? That's not normal." Rodney tossed him his pants and started digging around for his own, "Maybe it's rabies. Space rabies! I told you not to pet that canary-dog thing on PX-928!" He ushered John out of the door without any concern for passer-by’s that might catch them, scratching his shoulder neurotically.
"If I mutate Colonel, you're the first one I'm coming after."
John didn't doubt it. Maybe when he did, he'd finally get lucky.
End
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korilian
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(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-18 09:43 pm (UTC)You're totally right - no way would an admitted hypochondriac who complains about every ache and pain get off on biting.
Of course, now anytime I read a story with Sheppard biting McKay, I'm going to be going "Yeah, right".
And the last line is great - I can just see the look on Sheppard's face.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-18 10:30 pm (UTC)Also thank you! :)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-18 09:46 pm (UTC)Space rabies......HaHaHaHaHaH! Doesn't John know better than to introduce a new kink after interacting with a strange creature. Also, I bet that when Carson was in medical school that he never thought he would be treating possible mutations caused by "canary-dog things". Hilarious.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-18 10:31 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-18 09:51 pm (UTC)I can so picture this. Perfect McKay voice.
Space rabies, mutation, when I laughed out loud my daughter gave me the 'Shes finally cracked!' look.
Now I want to know how they explained to Carson.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-18 10:32 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 12:27 am (UTC)Can we get this meme in fanon killed?
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 04:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 01:05 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 04:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 03:39 am (UTC)...and then I went away and thought about it for a while and committed fic over at my LJ. Hope you don't mind?
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 04:04 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 05:45 am (UTC)and
"If I mutate Colonel, you're the first one I'm coming after." hahaha.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-19 04:06 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-22 11:50 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-31 12:40 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-14 03:03 pm (UTC)